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Wednesday, August 22, 2001
We both recently read Anthony Bourdain's autobiography, "Kitchen Confidential." I checked to see whether the Dreadnaught, the first restaurant to employ Bourdain, still operated in Provincetown, Mass. If it did, we could check it out on one of our free afternoons in Boston. Unfortunately, it is 'naught. Tuesday, August 21, 2001
Luke's Codes of Baseball Etiquette, one in a series: Don't be a boor. How to be a boor, in 10 easy steps: 1. Arrive late. Ask everyone what you missed. 2. Be loud. Swear. When someone points out the doe-eyed six-year-old sitting behind you, say, "Oops, my bad," but do not use this as an excuse to cease your swearing. 3. One inning, one beer. 4. Tip your beer man a quarter. Act as though you just bought him a car. 5. Pepper your jeers with such witticisms as "You suck!", "You suck!" and, for variety, "You suck!" 6. On every grounder from the visiting team, yell "Double play ball!" That there are two outs does not mean you should not do this. 7. When cheering, mispronounce your own team's players, such as "Denial" for "Delino," "Petterman" for "Patterson" and "this fucking Mexican kid" for "Zambrano." 8. When your team's slugger hits any fly ball, out of the infield or not, be the first to stand and scream: "Oh, he jacked that one! It's out of here!" 9. If a ballgirl declines to toss a ball into the stands, mutter. "That bitch." 10. Leave after last call. When waddling out, step on as many toes as possible. Any beer left in your cup should be dribbled on the row in front of you. I got a bad-manners seminar Monday night when I sat in front of a father-son boor battery, each trying to out-jackass the other. It was a double header, natch. Last call didn't come for six hours, so of 18 innings, only for the last three did I enjoy relative peace and quiet. Monday, August 20, 2001
There will be times on this trip when words fail us, so we'll need a digital camera. Sandy thinks he can borrow a Nikon Coolpix 950, but it has a flaky power supply. I'm tempted to tap my so-called tax rebate and buy either a new Coolpix or an Olympus C-700. The Nikon would be the better deal, but long ago I promised myself I'd never buy a device with the word "cool" in its name. Any advice?
Not that we'll have a lot of spare time driving between cities, but if we manage to scrounge some together, we should rely a roadsideamerica.com to figure out where to go. Sunday, August 19, 2001 1. Bud Smith, Cardinals Things being equal, I'd give the win to Bierbrodt (pronounced "beer brat"), but Smith gets it for having a name made not only for baseball but for Busch Stadium in particular. *Current players; minimum 20 at-bats or 25 innings pitched |
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