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Written by Tricia Tenpenny for Don Felder's 50th birthday (9/21/97), this is a parody of Don Felder & Don Henley's Visions.
Visions that I'll still rock 'n' roll
Visions that I'll never grow old
Sweet baby, let's have a rendezvous
If you think I'm too old -- well, it just ain't true
I'm going to live all my fantasies
COME ON, LET'S TAKE A WHEELCHAIR RIDE
So what if I've got arthritic knees
I'M THE ONLY EAGLE WHOSE HAIR AIN'T DYED
I like to party but I can't stay awake
BELIEVE ME BABY, I'M YOUNG INSIDE
But I've got fifty candles on my birthday cake
Play on, Fingers Felder, play on
Play on, Fingers Felder
I'll play my guitar but I won't play the blues
GONNA MAKE THE YOUNG GUITARISTS SAY "WOW!"
I'll stay young at heart 'cause the music renews
LOOK AT ALL THE WOMEN CHASIN' ME NOW
Oh, I drive 'em wild when I do what I do
NOTHIN'S EVER GONNA SLOW ME DOWN
If you think I'm too old -- well, it just ain't true
It just ain't true
Copyright 1997 by Patricia L. Tenpenny
Visions copyright 1975? by Don Felder & Don Henley
Written by Erin Chun for Don Felder's 50th birthday (9/21/97), this is a parody of Don Felder & Don Henley's Visions.
Fifty, you are far from old.
Fifty is, middle aged I'm told.
For this special day, I have written this song.
I hope you think it's nice, 'cause it took me so long.
Go ahead enjoy, all your fortune and fame.
(You can play your music and then make some green.)
But you just can't hide from us, 'cause we all know your name.
(Go ahead, celebrate, make a big scene.)
You play the best you can, and we want an encore.
(You know we just can't get enough of you.)
You're just so damn good, that we always want more.
Play on you rock and roll God, play on.
Play on you rock and roll God.
Happy Birthday, blow your candles out quick.
(It's the only thing that's gonna save your house.)
Happy Birthday, play your favorite lick.
(Don't you know I want to go and meet you somehow?)
Fifty years old, and you still rock so true.
(If I don't meet you I can say that I tried.)
If I can't have it all, just a taste will do;
just a taste of you.
Copyright 1997 by Erin Chun
Visions copyright 1975? by Don Felder & Don Henley
Written by Erin Chun for Glenn Frey's 49th birthday (11/6/97), this is a parody of Glenn Frey & Jack Tempchin's Common Ground.
Wonderin' what in the world to get him
On the night before his birthday
While the time just keeps on ticking
And the dark is turning light.
Suddenly I had a great thought
I'll just write a birthday song
So here is what I've come up with
This is for the birthday boy.
Though I've been stuggling to find the right words
I can't think of a thing
I realize I'd better hurry
So tomorrow we can sing
As I write this down the bell's ringing
It is almost time for school
I had better think of something
Or I'll never be done in time.
Now my time is running out
So I'll have to make this quick
I want to wish you a happy birthday
'Cause today you're forty-nine.
So just blow out all the candles
And then make a birthday wish
Right before your eyes you'll be surprised
This is for the birthday boy
This is for the birthday boy.
So many years have come and gone
And you've had some real good times
When you look back on this night
Remember it with a smile
We've celebrated for your birthday
The cake we cut and ate
But we all must say good night now
For it's way way past your bedtime.
After years and years of keepin the beat
You're reverting back to tappin' your feet
It's time to wake up now and take a look around
Because you are the birthday boy
You're getting old and you're forgetting things
You can't remember your own name
But you don't need to wonder why
Because you are the birthday boy
Because you are the birthday boy
Birthday boy
Birthday boy...etc.
Copyright 1997 by Erin Chun
Common Ground copyright 1995 by Glenn Frey & Jack Tempchin
Written by Tricia Tenpenny for Glenn Frey's 49th birthday (11/6/97), this is a parody of Don Henley & Glenn Frey's The Long Run.
We used to hurry a lot, we used to worry a lot,
We used to stay out till the break of the day
We had to admit it, it was high time we quit it
We just couldn’t carry on that way
Oh, we hate to slow down, you know it’s true
Only one of us is young now, and you know who
Who can go the distance?
Glenn Frey can; he’s the young one
---HE’S THE YOUNG ONE
And he doesn’t need assistance
Not this man; he’s the strong one
---HE’S THE STRONG ONE
We can’t help turnin’ fifty, there ain’t nothin’ we can do
But he’s just forty-nine, Glenn will still come through
He’s the young one
Ooh, I hate to tell you he’s the young one
Oh, Glenn, I don’t understand how you can look so much better,
Despite the crazy things that you do
Why, all the Chippendale dancers, buddy,
Couldn’t hold a candle to you
Women still think you’re cute, women still think you’re hunky
While the rest of us hear that they think we’re too chunky
Who is gonna make it?
Glenn Frey can; he’s the young one
---HE’S THE YOUNG ONE
He don’t have to fake it
Not this man; he’s the strong one
---HE’S THE STRONG ONE
Well, we’re sore but Glenn ain’t achin’
Need a nap but Glenn’s still shakin’
He’s the young one
Ooh, I hate to tell you he’s the young one
Copyright 1997 by Patricia L. Tenpenny
The Long Run copyright 1979 by Cass County Music/Red Cloud Music ASCAP
Written by Tricia Tenpenny for Don Henley's 50th birthday (7/22/97), this is a parody of Don Henley & Danny Kortchmar's Dirty Laundry.
You've done some living and you've paid your dues
Now you're turning fifty and you're not amused
Don't let it give you the blues
Have a happy birthday
Well, you coulda been a cowboy but you wound up here
Made a whole lotta money, drank a whole lotta beer
Love it when the people cheer
Have a happy birthday
Light the candles up
Blow the candles out
Light the candles up
Blow the candles out
Light the candles up
Blow the candles out
Light the candles up
What's it all about?
Gonna throw the biggest party that your money can buy
You're as old as you feel and you're feeling quite spry
So what if you're hair is dyed?
Have a happy birthday
Gonna keep making music, you ain't dead yet
You know, the boys in the band have got a running bet
Which verse will ol' Don forget?
Have a happy birthday
When the clock strikes midnight, you're stifling a yawn
But you're still gonna stay up and party till dawn
Lucky are the cards you've drawn
Have a happy birthday
Light the candles up
Blow the candles out
Light the candles up
Blow the candles out
Light the candles up
Blow the candles out
Make another wish
What's it all about?
You can see a few wrinkles beneath those blue eyes
But women like you better than younger guys
Don't forget to exercise
Have a happy birthday
Got a closet full of Grammys -- you sure can sing
Got a pretty little daughter and a wedding ring
Wouldn't want to change a thing
Have a happy birthday
Copyright 1997 by Patricia L. Tenpenny
Dirty Laundry copyright 1982 by Woody Creek Music (adm. by WB Music Corp.)/WB Music Corp. ASCAP
Written by James Barefield for Randy Meisner's 52nd birthday (3/8/98), this is a parody of Jack Tempchin's One More Song.
He was singing in a band
Its name was Poco
After a while it seemed like time to go
And the man
With permed hair and eyes on fire
Said Randy boy
Come and play in our songs.
Birth Day Song!
For the bass player
Birth Day Song!
For all those hits he done.
A birthday song for this man
Who walked out the door
Birth Day Song
Who knows what's to come?
Him and his buddies
They were known as the Eagles
He had to leave them
For good that rainy night
But he sang us one more
In our old cyber bar
Beneath the broken
Microsoft sign.
Birth Day Song!
Fifty-two years gone by
Birth Day Song!
He had good times, he had bad
A birthday song for this rogue
Who's singing along
Birth Day Song
For too many hands.
He thought it's funny
The way Henley's hair makes you
Pack away your bass guitar.
He was singing this song as his car raced along
Joe in the back, was singing along...
Birth Day Song!
Most of us were sad
Birth Day Song!
When a certain kinda fool
A birthday song for the guy
Who should never have quit
Birth Day Song
Take it to the limit
He took it to the limit...
Copyright 1998 by James Barefield
One More Song copyright 19?? by WB Music Corp.
Written by Erin Chun for Randy Meisner's 52nd birthday (3/8/98), this is a parody of Randy Meisner & Kaz Eric Justin's Hearts on Fire.
had himself a good life
singing with the guys
he has no idea
the hearts that his song buys
years keep passing by
but he's not over the hill
he may be getting older
but he's looking younger still
i been achin'
from desire
my blood's running like a ragin' river
'cause his song's on fire
i can't write a letter
cause i don't know where he lives
but i can write a song
and it goes just like this
sing another love song
and play your bass guitar
gonna roll on down the highway
rocking on with randy all night
i been achin'
from desire
my blood's running like a ragin' river
'cause his song's on fire
etc.
Copyright 1998 by Erin Chun
Hearts on Fire copyright 19?? by Glasco Music Co. & Nebraska Music Co.
Written by Phyllis Keeton for Randy Meisner's 51st birthday (3/8/97), this is a parody of Randy Meisner & Don Felder's Too Many Hands.
Written by Erin Chun for Timothy B. Schmit's 50th birthday (10/30/97), this is a parody of Timothy B. Schmit & Bruce Gaitsch's For the Children
Now has come the time when one more year has gone by.
You started out in Poco, but you're an Eagle today;
We must all go into our hearts,
Now you're turning fifty, but it doesn't show
We must all go into our hearts,
You know your songs give us a strong feeling of who you are.
We must all go into our hearts, Written by Tricia Tenpenny for Timothy B. Schmit's 50th birthday (10/30/97), this is a parody of Timothy B. Schmit, Don Henley, & Glenn Frey's I Can't Tell You Why
Look at me, baby, every night
Without a dye job, my hair would be white
Even though I'm fifty on this day This is an original song written by Tricia Tenpenny for Joe Walsh's 49th birthday (11/20/96) & revised for his 50th birthday.
Can you believe that ol' Joe Walsh turns 50 on this date?
A hundred thousand fellas wanna play guitar like Joe.
Joe was paid a visit by that nasty Father Time
He said, "I'll be performing in a hat made of balloons,
Joe, the smoke alarm is shrieking, so blow out those candles quick;
sometimes hard to find on the radio
No more Eagles glory,
but he could tell us some stories
that we all should know
too many miles down the road
but the boy can still sing
and miles don't mean a thing
when you're a classic
voice that had no guile
in his younger years
But for him there was no rest
so he did what was best
for his future
you may turn on your radio
One of these days
you might hear that soothing sound
Cause his fire is still burning
and his song is still waiting to be found
too many miles down the road
'cause the boy can still sing
and miles don't mean a thing
when you're a classic.
Copyright 1997 by Phyllis Keeton
Too Many Hands copyright 1975? by Randy Meisner & Don Felder
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For Your Birthday
It's your birthday again.
I know you don't believe it
And that the time seems to fly:
It's 5 years times 10.
Your great voice is so clear.
It's getting rarer
To see you up on the stage,
But your fans are still here.
Then we will know just how to start.
We've got to give all--all that we can in some way
For your birthday today.
You still sing it through.
We want a solo tour--
We love you more than you know.
Your music rings out so true.
Then we will know just how to start.
We've got to give all--all that we can in some way
For your birthday today.
You ought to see that we believe you are our own star.
Then we will know just how to start.
We've got to give all--all that we can in some way
For your birthday today.
Copyright 1997 by Erin Chun
For the Children copyright 1990 by Timothy B. Schmit & Bruce Gaitsch ASCAP
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I Still Make 'Em Sigh
Breaking the young girls' hearts
They weren't even born yet
Back when the Eagles got their start (ooh-oh)
Even though I'm fifty on this day
I feel like a young man anyway
'Cause I still make 'em sigh
I've got some wrinkles too
I don't have to worry -- girls still write
And say "We love you"
Nothin's wrong as far as I can see
I'll still be singing when I'm sixty-three
'Cause I still make 'em sigh (oh, baby)
I still make 'em sigh
I still make 'em sigh
I feel like a young man anyway
'Cause I still make 'em sigh (oh-oh baby)
I still make 'em sigh
I still make 'em sigh
I still make 'em sigh
Copyright 1997 by Patricia L. Tenpenny
I Can't Tell You Why copyright 1979 by Jeddrah Music/Cass County Music/Red Cloud Music ASCAP
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Funk #50
His cake burns like a bonfire and yet he's feeling great.
He doesn't mind the birthdays 'cause he'll stay young as long
As he can find the heart and soul to write another song.
His fans buy all his albums and he makes a lot of dough.
A hundred thousand women wanna be played like Joe's guitar.
I guess that's why he says that life's been good to him so far.
But Joe gave him a boot right in the -- Oops! That doesn't rhyme!
He said, "I'll keep on rockin' but not in a rockin' chair.
And when I feel like rollin' you won't see no wheelchair there."
Setting lots of toes a-tappin' with my brand-new Joe Walsh tunes!
I'll keep running for high office and composing weirdo themes!"
And he played a lick heard 'round the world despite the cheers and screams.
Plug in your favorite guitar and get out your favorite pick.
We'll all sing 'Happy Birthday' and you'll finally get your wish:
An end to this silly rockabilly birthday song from Trish!
Copyright 1997 by Patricia L. Tenpenny
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